Denny Crane: I don't fear death - never have. But I do fear being hooked up to a machine ... would you want to live like that?
I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life. (Lois knocks Peter out.)I woke several hours later in a daze.
It's not fun being blind. Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Maybe he can't see that he's smiling. Am I smiling, Earl?
I've often found that it's the chubby girls who offend most easily. I don't know why because I'm not a psychiatrist. For what it's worth I like chubby girls, I enjoy chubby sex. What I'm trying to say is if this is a lonely chubby's cry for help. I'm here for you Lori.
Hat's off, there, Barbie. That was one potent combination of verbal diarrhea and stunned silence.
I like you. If I could ever get used to staring at that thing on your face, we could hang out.
''As soon as I woke up, I realized that sleeping with Joy three days before her wedding was a huge mistake.
There's a store on Eighth Avenue that specializes in...how to put this delicately...battery powered, adult recreational...fake penises.
Lemon, I would like to teach you something. I would like to be Michelle Pfeiffer to your angry black kid who learns that poetry is just another way to rap.
