tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22467334866284533802012-02-16T01:19:45.793-08:00Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.comBlogger301100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-62955732300239086532008-07-23T01:06:00.000-07:002008-07-23T01:09:22.796-07:00

Denny Crane: I don't fear death - never have. But I do fear being hooked up to a machine ... would you want to live like that? Alan Shore: No, Denny, if it came to that, I'd pull the plug. Denny Crane: Pull the plug? That's no way to die. I want you to shoot me!

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-62249468582126772972008-07-23T01:01:00.000-07:002008-07-23T01:03:32.584-07:00

I have the results of your DNA Test. I am very serious about doctorppatient confidentiality, so I am gonna have to ask that all four of us keep this to ourselves.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-24656072032742552072008-07-23T00:55:00.000-07:002008-07-23T00:58:00.695-07:00

Oh, I almost forgot, I need to give a 16-year-old patient magic mushrooms to treat cluster headaches. That cool?

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-75149952201950536002008-07-22T17:28:00.000-07:002008-07-22T17:30:00.802-07:00

Damn that Brockman! There are only two rules in TV -- don't swear and don't whip it out! It's not rocket science!

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-4327343013795062682008-07-22T17:24:00.000-07:002008-07-22T17:27:33.860-07:00

Oh, my God! This is like 60 Minutes, when at first you're really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then, you know, you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-55066835598748899022008-07-22T17:18:00.000-07:002008-07-23T00:59:29.818-07:00

There's two kinds of guys. The ones who hold your hand and the ones that f**k you.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-48936572552763936662008-07-06T19:01:00.000-07:002008-07-06T19:03:18.860-07:00

I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-7134839575250950242008-07-06T18:57:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:59:18.473-07:00

You Look Unhappy, I like That

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-42993876493611968692008-07-06T18:50:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:51:40.002-07:00

It's not fun being blind. Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Maybe he can't see that he's smiling. Am I smiling, Earl?

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-15008032355898152622008-07-06T18:46:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:48:46.482-07:00

I've often found that it's the chubby girls who offend most easily. I don't know why because I'm not a psychiatrist. For what it's worth I like chubby girls, I enjoy chubby sex. What I'm trying to say is if this is a lonely chubby's cry for help. I'm here for you Lori.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-43439767892601974452008-07-06T18:42:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:46:08.586-07:00

Hat's off, there, Barbie. That was one potent combination of verbal diarrhea and stunned silence.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-40568368160031723562008-07-06T18:41:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:42:38.090-07:00

I like you. If I could ever get used to staring at that thing on your face, we could hang out.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-33847079620255573832008-07-06T18:17:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:21:25.215-07:00

''As soon as I woke up, I realized that sleeping with Joy three days before her wedding was a huge mistake.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-18203133452238240642008-07-06T18:13:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:14:45.568-07:00

There's a store on Eighth Avenue that specializes in...how to put this delicately...battery powered, adult recreational...fake penises.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-46370765453175307152008-07-06T18:08:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:11:27.531-07:00

Lemon, I would like to teach you something. I would like to be Michelle Pfeiffer to your angry black kid who learns that poetry is just another way to rap.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-20958866148765537772008-07-06T10:22:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:26:01.178-07:00

May I express a thought, because I so rarely get one, and I should preface this by saying that I'm so far up the ass of big business I view the world as one giant colon.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-25139315029493426482008-07-06T10:07:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:11:46.142-07:00

Well, you can huff... and you can puff... and... oh my god! I'm making a pig joke out of myself!

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-82008451651843366292008-07-06T10:03:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:12:12.961-07:00

JD: Y'know how I am totally down with the rap music?Turk: Dude... be whiter.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-18788780001588088412008-07-06T04:28:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:12:33.706-07:00

LIKE it? I love this cornbread so much I wanna take it back behind the middle school and get it pregnant.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-61054359815852304082008-07-06T04:23:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:12:51.959-07:00

I want to do that thing rich people do where they turn money into more money.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-5146283209347966802008-07-06T00:00:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:13:10.531-07:00

Last night I went to bed with a book, not nearly as much fun as a 29 year old, but the book contained a speech by Adlai Stevenson. The year was 1952, he said 'The tragedy of our day is the climate of fear in which we live and fear breeds repression. Too often sinister threats to the Bill of Rights, to freedom of the mind, are concealed under the cloak of anti-Communism.' Today, it's the cloak of

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-18038658339048299382008-07-05T23:55:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:13:30.777-07:00

I'm not a gay pirate, I have sex with my parrot all the time!...OK, that came out wrong.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-1125811088196800682008-07-05T19:44:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:13:49.061-07:00

Ted, tonight we're gonna go out. We're gonna meet some ladies, it's gonna be legendary. Phone-five!

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-76625635318609568132008-07-05T19:41:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:14:07.714-07:00

You couldn't push my buttons if you tried. In fact, I have no buttons. Please think of me as button-less, all smooth like G.I Joe's nether-regions. And, by the by, this image is brought to you by my son Jack, who has been yanking the pants off of his toy soldiers and leaving them in provocative positions on my nightstand. It is... just disturbing enough so that, leaving the house, I'm cranky and

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-7601475750172526172008-07-05T19:33:00.000-07:002008-07-06T18:52:53.396-07:00

What with Barbie here being rediculously book-smart to the point where she has almost no interpersonal skills and you being warm and cuddly as an un-potty trained labradoodle and about as useful in high-stress medical situations as an un-potty trained labradoodle, "together" the two of you make one barely passable doctor... slash labradoodle.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-23133633699312817152008-07-04T04:38:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:14:49.782-07:00

Did you hear that Meg? Guys can marry other guys now. So...this is awkward, but I mean, if they can do that, that is pretty much it for you, isn't it? I mean you as well pack it in. Game over.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-70820101011352352932008-07-03T21:58:00.001-07:002008-07-06T10:15:07.256-07:00

This is the reason why your headache didn't go away: That's actually pronounced analgesic, not anal-gesic. Sir, the pills go in your mouth.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-54023739675044234152008-07-03T21:54:00.001-07:002008-07-06T10:15:27.493-07:00

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-59084492886048923532008-07-03T21:50:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:15:46.754-07:00

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2246733486628453380.post-36517891156114338252008-07-03T21:43:00.000-07:002008-07-06T10:16:09.185-07:00

"I'm going to tell you this one more time with all the humility I can summon up. I'm the greatest trial attorney that ever lived. You will not beat me."

Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13275924332338331643noreply@blogger.com0